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Jennifers by Dean Lundquist

By Dean Lundquist - Posted on 16 November 2008

Actor, David Williamson is looking for the love of his life. He meets three potential candidates who all just happened to be named "Jennifer." David's on stage life begins to reflect his off stage life and vice versa. A richly symbolic play filled with music, fantasy, mythology and the theatre.

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Had a reading today. If you'd

Submitted by Dean Lundquist on Sat, 02/21/2009 - 1:33am.

Had a reading today.

If you'd like to read a draft of the play, please email me at dean(at)deanlundquist(dot)com or dean.lundquist(at)gmail(dot)com

Best,

Dean

Dean Lundquist
www.deanlundquist.com
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A triumph of the human spirit. A must see.

Submitted by Amy of the Lakes on Sun, 11/16/2008 - 7:22pm.

Twelve things about Jennifers: 1. By scene 2 I don't get why David is with Jen001 at all if she's a lousy lay. I thought she was a great lay and that was pretty much it. Or is he trying to impress Karla whom I believe he feels is his intellectual equal if not superior. Not even saying it needs a change -- or that any of it does, I'm just writing a couple of impressions. 2. Love all the action in scene 3 -- edge of my seat making sure I don't miss anything. Scene 4 -- I catch Jen002 in the green shirt with the Greensleeves. 3. Reading Eros & Psyche - I love plays where I learn something. I am already familiar with Eros and Psyche and am just off my chair with your choice of selection from it. Not what I would have picked, but my choice would have been much more obvious while yours has style. You're really bringing us into their (and your) world of Renaissance literature studies and Shakespeare and RenFests and madrigals. 4. I like how you show the advantage to a man of an older woman: more sure of herself. More at peace with her body and herself in general, more able to be buoyant and fun with him than perhaps another twenty something full of angst and wanting-to-go-there-because-she's-never-been-there would be. 5. Scene 5 -- this time he's the one all poetic and over the top falling for her right away because he's had a mind and body connection and thinks they're uncommon (they are, but only to a point). "If she's a sickness I have no need of a cure." If that's a quote from Midsummer, cool. If it's not, maybe look at whether it's cliched. Just saying... 6. Just giggling from the end of the scene. I'm trying to form a cohesive comment about it but I believe snickering is the appropriate response. Okay, I have the giggles now. 7. I just love the older woman thing. Instead of being the younger one, hoping and wishing and manipulating for him to say, "I love you first" to make the midnight promises in bed, she knows that such promises may just mean you're in bed and she accepts that some things are just as they are -- resplendent in their moment and over when they fade out. 8. I was just in the audience whooping and cheering with Carloth bumping and grinding and being Phedrrrrra. 9. Just enjoying the rest of ACT II -- the intimate apparel in the copy machine. The tension between David and Jen3. The letters. The voices of Jen1 and Jen2 as the actresses. 10. No Hedonists allowed. :-) 11. The full circle from KARLa (and you know me with my name origins I didn't miss this) saying "he adores you, you know" to Jen2 to CARLos saying, "she adores you, you know" to David about Jen3" is brilliant. And you know Charles means king, right? I knew you did. And just today I read in 1 Samuel about King Saul wanting a musician for his court and Samuel told him about David, "a talented and FINE looking man." 12. While I love the USPS I won't comment on the rest for fear of spoilers for future readers. I love the opera.

Ash Sanborn, the playwriting nom de plume of Amy Hillgren Peterson. Playwright, restorative justice practitioner, life force

Thanks so much, Amy!

Submitted by Dean Lundquist on Sun, 11/16/2008 - 11:34pm.

I'm so glad you liked it.

I've had problems with that second scene. Partly because I haven't been able to really see the space where it takes place. David is with Jen because theirs is merely a physical attraction. Jen wants it to be more but can't really relate to David on an emotional/intellectual level. She is very much a trophy girl to him--just like her sports car. I imagine the play staged in 3 distinct areas. One of them is the backstage/off stage area. I know it takes place there and they watch the 'performing' space where the madrigals sing.

Also, have problems with Karla/Carlos and their individual journies.

Karla - is searching for something more. She wants the freedom of an artistic life. When she's with men, she becomes one of them. When with women, she is one of them too. She envies those who are artists. She wants to be like them. Also, David suspects that there is perhaps something going on between Jenny and her in the end. Also, what is her music? In the end, because she loves Jenny so and admires who she is, she and Jenny make music together. Also, I didn't tie up her relationship with "Jaye" how it ended.

Carlos - is lost between who he is and who he wants to be. His outward appearance is a mask that he's created because it's easier to deal with the world with the mask on than strip it off. When he is at his lowest, David gives him the idea that he can do his own thing (which he ironically does with Jennifer). I think Carlos loves David for pointing that out to him. He loves him as well, but because he can't be with him, he wishes that he and Jennifer would couple. I think he adopts Jennifer's music at the beginning. But along the way, he finds his own. I think that is the music on his answering machine. But I still don't know what it is. Maybe it's Orpheus.

I still have another level to play with their names. Only one of their surnames came out in the play. Don't know if it's a bit OTT with her and David's surnames. Jenny Hathaway and David Williamson. See if you can puzzle it out...:)

The suggestions I've gotten from our dramaturgs are great. I will play around with twin and glass, mirror as they are important symbols in the play. Talking it out like this helps a lot.

I made Jennifer's surname Nightingale--two reasons: the songbird, and the famous eponymous nurse. Can play with this more in re-write.

Oh, does David's spectacles and the symbolism come through? There's not a lot of dialogue that addresses them. They were an afterthought really, but I liked it so much, I kept it. I may have missed a few key spots where they are on or off.

Does the dream/fantasy at Jennifer's work? Is it believable enough? It's a long time from when the seed gets planted to when it actually grows to blossom. (i.e. David dreaming in verse)

Lastly, what do you infer from the end? Does the end/beginning sequence work? It's kind of ambiguous on purpose, but I am interested in knowing what you think will happen.

Thanks so much for those incredible comments.

Much love,

Dean

First Draft

Submitted by Dean Lundquist on Sun, 11/16/2008 - 5:51pm.

Please feel free to read the script. I added the title page today and still have a few things to fix. I appreciate any and all feedback (good and bad). If you don't like something, please let me know why. Conversely, if you do like things, feel a certain way, etc., please let me know those too.

Much love,

Dean

2nd Draft

Submitted by Dean Lundquist on Tue, 11/25/2008 - 8:18pm.

Hi all-

Here's my 2nd draft--it's 79 pages after putting in Celtx and editing.

Best,

Dean

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Name
Dean Lundquist

Location
Singapore

Professional Website
http://www.deanlundquist.com

Years Participating in NaPlWriMo

2008 - Jennifers
2009 - A Rose by Any Other Name

Favorite Playwright
Mary Zimmerman, Alex Broun, Martin McDonagh

Personal Website
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Jennifers by Dean Lundquist

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